I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Just invented taco cereal.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize