But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
