I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
