I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
