The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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