I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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