Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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