Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
