You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
