i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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