when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
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