so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
