I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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