Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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