They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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