I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I still have a little drunk in my system
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
