i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
