I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
if only i could text you this smell
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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