D3 body, D1 cock
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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