how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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