omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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