I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
