Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Your cock deserves a montage
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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