I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
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