One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
