i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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