i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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