i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
