Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
