none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
She announced her abortion via fbk
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
