so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
