we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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