There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
