youre lurking in front of me
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Randomize
