I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize