I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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