i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Randomize
