I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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