oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I think people are normalizing furries
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
