He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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