there's paper in my vomit.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
