McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
i believe in u and ur pee
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
