Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
