I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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