yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
