dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
