literally had 100 drinks last night.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
