I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
