Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize