so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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